How many miles to the nearest Walmart?

I was hiking through the lush, green rainforest with my mom when we got to an observation treehouse site exploding with lemurs. She pulled out a huge bag, looked me straight in the eyes and said "your younger brother wants me to bring home 75 pounds of lemur meat." So I was like "what the hell, mom, you can't do that!" To which she replied "I know, I'm just bringing home one live lemur instead." Then I woke up from my dream.

Okay now I'm actually going to tell you about the last few weeks of my life, starting with my unforgettable journey to the Betampona Reserve, briefly discussing my research and experiences in the mountains of Madagascar, and ending with me sitting on the floor of my hotel room typing this post (which is happening right this second).

The door to our taxi bus wasn't connected to the rest of the vehicle. I take that back--a seatbelt was strategically wrapped around the door and roof holding them together. Sort of. And that was probably the safest, most secure part of the bus.


There were 14 of us crammed into an 11 person bus, which doesn't sound that bad. But when you take into account the luggage and food required for 14 people on a month long trip it sounds a little bad. And when I tell you that the bus we rode in wasn't so much a bus but more like randomly assembled metal pieces held together by rust and sheer determination it starts to sound like an unfortunate situation. I haven't even gotten to the worst part yet, so buckle your seatbelt (something none of us were able to do because our seatbelts were holding the vehicle together) because you're in for a rough ride.

So we're in the death trap (that's what I'm calling the taxi bus, keep up) and it's hot outside, so hot. Humid too. We're slammed together like sardines and dripping in sweat while driving down this road (by "road" I mean a rocky dirt area with huge holes overflowing with water). The windows are open (because it's so hot and we're dying) and tree branches are flying through the windows, hitting us in the face (because we're bumping along this "road" trying to avoid the huge holes of water). Meanwhile, every passenger is looking up at the roof of the vehicle because we're sure it's gonna collapse on us. You know, because the sides of the bus aren't even connected to the roof. Somehow the roof didn't crush us during the 3 hour drive and we survived the first part of our journey to Betampona.

Next we had to take a canoe across a river. It's casual. When we got to the other side they told us there wasn't enough room in our new vehicle for all of us plus our luggage--which was the greatest thing I had heard all day because that meant we were hiking. I spent all of 30 seconds with my group and then started walking faster (why were they walking so slow?). And fast walking is a lot like running so I figured I might as well start running, right?

Okay remember when I said being white and blonde kind of draws a lot of attention to me in Madagascar? Yeah well white blonde girls running up mountains is clearly something they have never seen before. It got to the point where I didn't know if I should walk through the little villages to draw less attention to myself or sprint through them so I could get out faster. 

After an hour of stares, people yelling at me in Malagasy, a crazy man trying to run with me, and a random guy offering me a ride on his bike; a bus finally passed me and then stopped. "Keely! Get in!" Everyone had been picked up by the bus holding our luggage and was crammed into it. Apparently all the people I passed were talking about "a crazy white girl running very fast" (I was just glad they weren't talking about "a crazy white girl peeing on the side of the road").

After 20 minutes of driving we got to a mountain trail (a trail I would climb and descend daily over the next few weeks) and were told we had to hike the rest. YES. So I ran and hiked and it was the most beautiful run I've ever been on. I can't even describe how incredible the mountains are here. At the very top of the mountain is the Betampona Reserve. ON TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN. How cool is that?! It's paradise (I'll upload pictures). 

Almost every day my team and I backpacked for 1-6 hours to the surrounding villages in order to survey the residents. Some days were sunny and beautiful but other days were rainy, unbelievably muddy, and completely exhausting. (Climbing up our mountain in the rain has been described as being "as painful as childbirth.") Thankfully the Malagasy people were always helpful and accommodating with our research and made those muddy days worth it.

Every night before I went to sleep I had to check my bed for cockroaches and spiders (sometimes I didn't check thoroughly and regretted it). When it hadn't rained for a few days I had to carry buckets of water up a mountain to bathe and then when it rained nonstop for a week EVERYTHING was wet. (I don't think you understand how humid and wet it was so I'm gonna elaborate a little. It was so wet that my clothes never fully dried and started to grow mold. It was so wet that when I got into bed at night the sheets were damp. It was so wet that we would find leeches sucking our blood after venturing into the forest. Okay do you understand now?) I had to do my laundry by hand, which was horrible, and had shit into holes in the ground, which wasn't that horrible. My fingernails always had dirt under them and my hair was never brushed. My legs and feet were covered in blisters, scratches, and infected mosquito bites. The skin between my toes was bloody and raw. My clothes were always muddy and I smelled like sweat with a slight hint of pee. (Do I sound appealing yet?) I woke up when the sun rose and fell asleep when the sun set. In my free time I played cards and read books while lemurs jumped between trees 10 feet above my head (I read 9 books over the past 4 weeks. I haven't read that many books since I was 3 years old and "books" were only 10 pages long). 

But here's the thing: I loved it. The cold bucket showers became refreshing. I craved rice, beans, and vegetables for every meal. Reading took the place of using my phone or watching tv. Backpacking to villages and falling down muddy mountains was thrilling. Going to bed at 8:00 seemed normal. I loved the culture shock, the opportunities, the adventure, and the memories. Life was simple and beautiful. 

I have so much more to say about my research and life in Madagascar but if I keep writing this will turn into a novel, so the details will be for the people I see in person. Partially because this post is already so long and partially because when people ask me how my trip was I want to be able to tell them something they haven't already read. Anyway, I wonder if anyone stuck around long enough to even make it to this point of my post. Sorry if you're bored, it's almost over. Now that I'm back in civilization I'm going to go sit on a toilet, take a shower, look in a mirror, turn on a fan, and email my mom--all at the same time. Too ambitious? See ya in 10 days, America. 

Salama Vasa

The president of Madagascar was just impeached. No one here really cares about it but I think it seems like important information. Maybe? Aside from the government crumbling to the ground things are going pretty well.

Unfortunately I had to pay $10,000 ariary to get into the zoo in Tana, which is 20 times the amount a local has to pay. That's only $3.50 in US dollars but still, I could have bought half of a Chipotle burrito with that money. Oh and you know how zoo's in America have rules? Like "don't feed the animals" or "no tapping on the glass." The only rule here is "don't get in the cage with the animal." Which is a really great rule, people should totally follow that.

Leaving the city was easy, quick, and painless. And by that I mean it only took us an hour to figure out which bus to take while we were harassed by a drunk man who wanted our jackets and bombarded by homeless people who begged us for money. Easy, quick, and painless.

The drive to the first village blew my mind. It was so exotic, green, and mountainous. Madagascar is without a doubt the most beautiful place I've ever been. When we got to the rainforest we went on a guided hike and saw tons of lemurs. I don't have anything funny or sarcastic to say, it was just really incredible.

We began our research at the first village a few days ago. It's awesome. We've been collecting data on what food is available at local markets (dry fish surrounded by flies seems like best option) and have completed a good amount of diet diversity and food security questionnaires. The Malagasy people are so welcoming even though we don't speak the same language (our translator is awesome).

The Malagasy children are fascinated by us and love the scale and height measurement tool we brought. I've never seen anyone so impressed by a scale. Especially since they have no clue how much they should weigh. They'll step on the scale and it will read something like "27.2 kg" and they are SO EXCITED ABOUT IT. They also want us to play games and dance with them. I even got to hold a baby for a while and it didn't cry at all. It's also possible that my camera has 200 pictures of blurry and sideways Malagasy kids (their picture taking skills need a little work). Anyway, the research is so fun and rewarding, even if I'm having dreams where everyone speaks Malagasy.

Now we're in Tamatave (not that any of you know where that is) until Saturday morning. After that we'll be driving/boating/hiking to our final research area where we'll stay for about four weeks while surveying the surrounding villages. When I get home I plan on eating a gallon of ice cream. Anyone is welcome to join me but you have to commit to the whole gallon.

*When you have a mosquito net covering your bed and you wake up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night WATCH OUT BECAUSE YOU COULD GET TANGLED IN IT AND FALL OVER.

I HAVE INTERNET IN MADAGASCAR (for like 2 days)

"Do you have any explosive bombs or gasoline in your luggage?" This was the third time I had the man at the security screening in the Narobi Airport repeat himself. Partially because of his thick Kenyan accent and partially because I wasn't sure why he was asking me if I was bringing bombs on the plane. "Ummm nope, definitely didn't pack any of those..." What if I was a terrorist and had packed explosives though, is this where I was supposed to confess? "Yep, I have a few bombs and gallons of gasoline in my bags, you caught me. Killer detective work by the way."

Anyway, airplanes are awesome because they're speedy and can get you plus tons of other people plus all of your luggage (without bombs) anywhere in the world. But when you have four plane rides, two layovers, and four days of traveling to get where you need to be it seems a little less impressive. Still impressive, don't get me wrong, but instantaneous teleportation is really something we should be working on.

Flashback to the airport security in Africa where they intensely questioned Oliver, Zach and Alisha's 8 year old son, about the football he was traveling with. I guess footballs are dangerous...? Rachel's tweezers were also confiscated. God forbid the tweezers and football had both been on the plane because some serious shit would have gone down. Obviously. So yeah, get on board with the teleportation.

I'd also like to point out to my dad that "wearing tennis shoes so I can run away if the plane crashes" was not necessary. What a surprise.

During our layover in Kenya (why the flight from South Africa to Madagascar stopped in Kenya is something I'll never understand) we stayed at this rad hotel. The gate surrounding the hotel had lots of barbed wire. I don't know about you, but nothing makes me feel more at home than barbed wire. We were also warned to keep the door to our balcony closed in order to keep baboons and monkeys out of our room. For some reason no questions were asked.

After arriving at the airport in Madagascar we had someone drive us to Tana, the capital. And if you think New York City traffic is bad, then you're correct because it's definitely horrible, but Tana traffic is NUTS. I think driving on the right side of the road is more of a suggestion then an actual law. There are also tons of people walking across/on/around the streets. I honestly don't understand how the roads aren't littered with dead people. According to Zach, "pedestrians don't have the right-of-way here so if a car hits you it legally doesn't have to stop." It's very safe. At one point this kid jumped out the back of a taxi bus, ran over to a street vendor to buy a cigarette, then ran through traffic and jumped back onto the taxi bus where he held on with one hand and continued to smoke his cigarette. Meanwhile, another guy started peeing on the side of the road.

After a few hours of driving through this we got to our hotel, where we'll be staying for three days. I love it. It's old and rundown but so beautiful and comfortable. Plus the staff is awesome and the food is terrific. I mean it's mainly rice but the rice is really good for rice. If that makes sense.

Being a white person in Madagascar is very strange. Especially a white person with blonde hair. (I'm white and have blonde hair in case you've already forgotten what I look like.) Everyone stares at you (and not just because of my insanely good looks) and they swarm you at markets, trying desperately to sell you something. Plus they're speaking Malagasy (here is a reminder that Malagasy is not a language I'm familiar with) so I have no idea what they're saying. One dude followed me half a mile back to my hotel trying to sell me this musical instrument. Persistence is key, right? Well, not in his case, sorry dude.

In a day or two we're leaving the city and entering some less populated rainforest areas where we'll begin our research. I won't have electricity or running water so please enjoy that for me. That's it for now! Sorry that sometimes sarcasm  takes over my writing. The moral of this post is that I love Madagascar, love the people I'm with, and am so excited for this adventure to continue.

Note to future Keely back in America: buy macadamia nuts

Do you think I can have a pet lemur when I'm in Africa?

Have you ever been on a run where the trail ends? So you’re like okay I’ll run on these train tracks for a while. Then you think you see a different trail on the other side of the James River so you swim across it but it turns out it isn’t a trail. And you bushwhack through weeds and thorns which brings you to a highway that you have to run across. Then you slide down a hill to get back on the train tracks and eventually find the trail again. No? Does that not happen to a lot of people?  

Anyway summer is going REALLY well. I’ve spent a lot of time with my cats and I cut off three inches of my hair in my bathroom a few days ago. Plus I leave for Madagascar in one week. ONE WEEK. To prepare for my trip I plan to watch The Penguins of Madagascar movie because I’m pretty sure that’s all I need to know, right? Contacting me will be realllly difficult so try not to miss me too much. If that doesn’t work then picture me walking through rad rainforests with a sweet safari hat while talking to local Malagasy people about their diets. I get back to America on July 10^th so if you want to text me or send me a fruit basket or show up at my house or bring me a million dollars then that’s when you should do it. Once I get back I’ll either be in Richmond shadowing a Physician Assistant and working (someone please hire me, I’m poor) or possibly maybe but probably not going to New Mexico and working as a zipline tour guide until school starts again.

I also figured out what I want to do with my life and it includes a dietetic internship, the Peace Corps, Physician Assistant school, traveling the world, and being the happiest person on the planet. I would discuss it more but I need to finish season six of Lost before I leave so I guess you could say I have important things planned for today.

Boston Marathon/the last 79 days of my life

• 26 miles feels longer when you’re stuck in traffic than when you’re running
• Don’t yell “MY QUADS ARE DESTROYED AND I JUST PEED MYSELF” to your friend at mile 19 of a marathon
• Rainy and cold marathons are rainy and cold
• Apparently people don’t know the difference between a 5K and a marathon
• Don’t feel bad if you eat half a gallon of ice cream in 24 hours
• But actually you should feel a little bad so maybe reevaluate your life
• WHAT IS HAPPENING IN LOST AND WHO ARE THE OTHERS
• I got an undergraduate summer research grant so my trip to Madagascar is free!!!!!
• Apparently I’ll be taking bucket showers/bathing in streams when I’m there though…?
• Sorority girls will reluctantly give you a ride back to your car if you happen to run 20 miles through the mountains in the opposite direction
• Sometimes you need to eat five Clif shot blocks at 7pm on a Wednesday night for no reason
• I’m not allowed to bring kidneys to sell on the black-market when I go to Madagascar
• Can I get a service dog for not being able to smell??
• I’m out of shampoo AND conditioner
• My computer still isn’t fixed
• HI MOM

Here's a title for my blog post

Yeah so when you don’t blog for 7 months remembering your password to log into your own account can be an issue. But alas, my password has been recovered and mankind will be saved. Here’s a quick update on the last few months of my existence:

Running: After my summer of 50 mile races, long days of running and hiking in the mountains, and pretty much nonstop outdoor activity in New Mexico and Colorado… I continued to brutally over-train until I absolutely hated exercising. Didn’t see that coming. I paced my friend for 40 miles in his first 100 mile race, ran Iron Mountain 50k (great race), ran the New River Valley 50k (not doing that again), ran Mountain Masochist 50 miler, and then ended my year with the Richmond Marathon. Which put me at about 10 long distance races for the year and some tired legs. After a month and half off (aka just casual running) I’m back and training for the Boston Marathon which is just 10 weeks away! I’m super excited about it. That’s about it on the running front. Doing less races this year and saving a lot of money in race fees hurrayyyy.

School: Ewww why did I make this a category. Basically it’s going well and I’m now double majoring in Dietetics and the Science of Food, Nutrition, and Exercise! If you’re interested in more specifics about my classes and homework, feel free to leave a comment and I definitely won’t reply.

Work: I have a job at school now because apparently my dad doesn’t want to pay for my expenses for the rest of my life. If anyone else is interested in giving me money with no strings attached I’ll be happy to accept though. Until then, I work in dining services at Tech which is actually pretty fun because the people are really cool and I work with my two best friends. I also had one crazy Saturday night where I applied to 7 summer jobs all across the country…… none of which I’ll be going to because I just found out that I’m doing research for seven weeks in Madagascar this summer. Pretty cool stuff, I’m jealous of future Keely’s life. I’ll be focusing on food security and malnutrition (probably eating a lot of rice and maybe petting some lemurs while I’m over there).

Adventures: Over winter break Hannah and I went on an epic road trip from Pennsylvania, down the coast to Florida, and then back up to Virginia. We stopped at some insanely cool places and spent a lot of time finding random parking lots to sleep in (current parking lots that are acceptable to sleep in: church, library, movie theater, grocery store, and park). We were only questioned by the cops once. Charleston is rad. Savanah, Georgia is super hipster for any of you hipsters, hipster posers, or hipster wanabees. Tree house hostels are probably more fun when it’s not 10 degrees outside. Shuffle board is not just for old people. 7 mile canoe trips can test your friendship..? The Coca Cola factory is AWESOME (even if you don’t like soda). Springer Mountain is the worst possible start to the Appalachian Trail…. No wonder so many people don’t finish hiking it. After like 0.9 miles the trail disappears and they’re probably like “fuck it, I didn’t sign up for this.” Tennessee has some WEIRD cities. Long trail runs are kind of miserable if it’s cold, foggy, and raining. Not showering for five days makes you feel gross. Beds are literally the best.

Miscellaneous:  Almond milk is my new favorite thing. Like if someone was threatening to murder my sister or pour out my almond milk….. I would save my sister because I’m not a psychopath. But after, I would go buy some more almond milk. Hannah and I plan to hold hands for 8 hours straight just to see if it’s possible. The apple I ate two days ago was subpar and I was kind of sad for like 10 minutes because of its graininess. I really need to get antivirus software on my computer because it’s not working well (but on the bright side, I have so many chances to “Click here to claim your $1,000 prize!!!!”). I ran out of cheerios so I’m going to the grocery store tomorrow. 

Grand Mesa 50 (55) Miler!

*This race report is rated R for inappropriate language and partial nudity

After my spontaneous 50 mile attempt back in June, that unfortunately ended at 43 miles due to medical complications (because I’m dumb and didn’t eat or drink enough) I was determined to complete a 50 before the summer ended. I literally signed up for Grand Mesa two days after that race. People were like, “you should rest” and “it starts at 10,500 feet you probably aren’t ready for that” and “it’s a really hard course with technical trails.” So naturally I ignored all of their warnings and signed up anyway. I mean, my summer basically consists of working and then running mountains in my free time, so I wasn’t concerned about the mileage or the altitude. Honestly, I was more worried about my shitty rolling turd (aka the green minivan) surviving the 7 hour trip to Cedaredge, Colorado.

Thankfully I got to the race with no car complications, checked in, went to the pre-race briefing and dinner, and then set up camp. I swear I sleep better in a tent than I do in an actual bed. I don’t know if it’s the fresh air or the sounds of nature or the threat of being attacked and killed (that’s what my mom always tells me will happen) but camping alone is spectacular.

So I woke up for the race at 4am and I was like, alright I’m feeling good! And then I was like, well I haven’t started running yet so maybe it’s too soon to make that call. But when the race started at 5am and my legs felt fresh I knew it was gonna be a great day for running. I cruised along the first 13 miles, talked to some awesome people, and met the selfie guy (who I actually didn’t talk to at all). He would literally stop running and take selfies, it was fantastic. Like don’t worry about the race, man, I just hope your pictures turn out nicely.

Anyway, after the first 13 miles there’s this 3.5 mile section that sucks balls. I hated it. There wasn’t really a trail, just rocks and branches and bushes. Plus this part of the course was marked horribly. I was basically just wandering around in the woods trying to find the pink flags that marked the course while getting attacked by a million mosquitoes (that’s not an exaggeration, there were a million of them). I ran off course two times in this section which was a little frustrating, but it didn’t add too much time and it was still early in the day so I felt great.

The next 15 miles were fantastic; the mesa was amazing, running felt incredible, and the rocks and dirt looked beautiful (possibly had a lot of endorphins at this point). Anyway, I was loving life and extremely happy. This happiness continued through the next aid station, through my third time running off course, and until about 7 hours into the race. I had just run off course for the fourth time and was hitting a low point. Pretty sure the only thing I thought from hours 7 to 8 was “I fucking hate this mesa” which was definitely a change from my earlier “I love this mesa!!!!” attitude. I tried to pull myself out of the low point by thinking of inspirational quotes but all I could think of was “may the force be with you” and that didn’t really help much.

I finally ran off course for the fifth time (adding a total of about 3 miles to the 52 mile course) and I was PISSED. I came up with an analogy for how the course was marked:

So some guy goes to the bathroom and takes a huge shit. He flushes the toilet and half of the poop goes down but the rest resurfaces, so there’s still kind of a lot of poop in the toilet. But the guy’s like, “ehhh, good enough.” And that’s how this course was marked.

So I was angry, upset, and drained. Basically on the verge of tears (like I never cry but there’s something about running for so long that really breaks you down). And let me tell you, if I wasn’t so pissed I would have cried. Thankfully I was still feeling good physically (hurray for properly training for an ultra!) and I was only breaking mentally. Plus I was so tired of eating Apple Cinnamon Gels. I’m pretty sure Apple Cinnamon Gels are made by the devil. Actually, I’m positive they are (to be fair, at the start of the race I did like them). But when I made it to an aid station at about 9:20 and only had 12 miles left my attitude changed completely.

I pooped at one point during the final climb and noticed this random old man about 200 feet away from me mid-poop (who was definitely not associated with the race). So when I ran by him I was like “hey, sorry for pooping right in front you.” And he was like, “you gotta do what you gotta do…” which is apparently pooping in front of strange (homeless?) old men. So I got to the final aid station and I was incredibly happy. Only 3.5 miles to go and I could hike the whole way back and still break 13 hours (because at this point my legs were pretty sore). So I hiked and ran a little and got attacked by more mosquitoes and then I crossed the finish line in 12 hours and 51 minutes. Fourth place female in the 50 miler! And as soon as I crossed the finish line this guy was like “hey, you want some Gels?” And that was probably the funniest thing that anyone said to me all day. So I was like, “you know, that’s really all I want right now.” And this conversation might not make sense to people who don’t run ultras but basically when you finish a race you want some real fucking food and Gels suck. A lot.

There were a lot of ups and down during my race. For a few hours I loved running more than anything and for a few hours I hated running so much and probably would have squirted Apple Cinnamon Gel on you if you annoyed me. But when I finished the race the bad parts didn’t seem so bad. That’s always what happens. And I’m guessing that’s what happens to most ultra runners because we always come back for more. When I’m running in the mountains I’m in a state of pure and natural happiness (even if it is one of those moments when I’m not actually happy).

The ultra running community is incredible. It’s a place where strangers with one common interest gather and leave as friends. It’s a place where 30 and 40 year olds will hang out with you after a race, let you use their shower, and take you to dinner. (Although when they found out I was 18 I got a lot of, “you’re ONLY EIGHTEEN??!?!” comments). It’s a place where everyone is included and everyone simply loves to run.

After the race, someone asked me why I run. Is it weird that I’ve never been asked that before? Or I’ve never been asked that in a serious manner, where someone is genuinely curious why an 18 year old wants to run so much. I didn’t really know how to answer. I do now.

I love that I can push myself to do something so many people can’t even imagine doing. I love that I can block out pain and push forward because that’s just what you have to do. I love being outside in the fresh air and mountains. I love the ultra running community. I love being in shape. I love that I can literally run 50 miles. Freedom. Mountains. Endorphins. Adventure. Determination. I just love to run.